But I Usually Have Such Good Luck with Online Psychics!

From Ask JohnQ.com: I recently consulted this online psychic and she told me that to solve a problem I would need to give a deposit of $1000 dollars and I would get it back in three days and return she sent me these crystals. Its been 2 weeks and I haven’t gotten my deposit back and cannot get in touch with her as she does not answer her phone. The money was transferred through western union and there was no receipt. I know this might be difficult but is there anyway that I could get my money back?

Dear I Hope You Like Your New $1000 Psychic Crystals:
*Ahem* We didn’t want to mention it right away in our advice column, but we here at Brutally Honest Babes are also Pcertified Psychics ©. We work for cheap wine, vintage clothes and Big Macs. We’re certain you have already sent your payment, so we’ll get right to it.

We don’t have a crystal ball, but Ethel has a dream book we like. Your personal troubles stem from a complete lack of common sense and possibly a chronic case of Pstupdity ©. You should invest your next $1000 in a shrink to help in problem solving, or possibly a therapeutic shopping trip involving Cynthia Rowley dresses and a shiny new Rabbit Pearl. You already know you’ve been taken. File a police report – bring all e-mail communication, Western Union account information, etc. to the police when you file. There’s a tiny minuscule chance they will catch this person, but in reality you should kiss your money goodbye. Damn online psychics ain’t what they used to be. Except for us, of course.

The moral of the story is – DON’T SEND $1000 TO A STRANGER OVER THE INTERNET. Sorry about the yelling – but you brought it on yourself.

Wow. We got through that without calling you a dumb shit once! Yay us.

How many ways can the BHBs say, "Dump Him"?

Here at Brutally Honest Babes, we sometimes take advice questions from other sites and answer them. Better. Below is an example.

Dear Consum-mate.com:
This guy I have been dating for six months always makes it a point that we take turns paying. I don’t mind taking turns, but hate the way he emphasizes it. When it is his turn to pay, he has already planned what we will do on our date. Sometimes I have reasons I can’t go out the day I get paid. When this happens, he will say something like; "you just don’t want to go because it is your turn to pay." This really bothers me. I have told him this, but he continues with the same behavior.

Perhaps what surprised me the most was when my birthday fell on a payday and it was my turn to pay. He asked me if I wanted to go out for sushi for my special day. Guess who paid for the meal? I did.

Is this kind of turn taking normal for couples? One time I jokingly told him that he should learn to treat a woman like a lady once in a while. He suggested that I was materialistic and manipulative. Does this guy need a relationship boot camp or should I just move on?

Dear Beauty with a Beast:

You paid for sushi on your birthday because it was “your turn”? Asking to be treated like a lady is materialistic and manipulative? Hmmm… let’s see if we can put our finger on your problem. Oh, yes. Your boyfriend’s an asshole.

Sharing in payment for dates is not in and of itself a bad thing. Although we do like the double standard of men paying for the first couple of dates at least, after a while it’s lovely for the woman to contribute to the fun filled festivities. And before any man comments on how awful that double standard is, and how if women want equality they should always go dutch… as soon as we make the same amount for the same job you do, then we can re-evaluate our stance. And - our hair costs way more.

Listen to the little voice inside of you. It’s telling you he’s domineering and manipulative about money. What happens when you marry Mr. Douchey? Does he help pay for the baby’s delivery, or not because it wasn’t him who was hospitalized? And have fun itemizing the phone bill so that you pay for your phone calls. In a long-term relationship, money troubles will come and go – do you really want this man on your team for the long haul? We think he only has one team - his own. You deserve a quarterback who will take a sack for you. Tee hee! We said sack.