Thursday, May 15, 2008

Unsolicited Advice: The Cure

God bless America. We have so much. We are spoiled rotten. Don't get us wrong, we Babes are grateful for the free country in which we live. Americans are so privileged--it seems that since we no longer have to grub and struggle for food or shelter on a day-to-day basis (come on, even minimum wage workers here eat and have an apartment)--anyway, it seems that since we generally don't have those sorts of problems, we have to create problems for ourselves. Many of our current problems really aren't issues in some other parts of the world.


*Anorexia and Bulimia are not major problems in Ethiopia.

*Obesity is not an issue in Ethiopia (no crash-celebrity diets or stomach-stapling necessary there).

*Alcoholism is not really a big deal in Ethiopia (you pretty much need grapes or grains or some other sort of excess food-stuffs to make booze).

*Mid-Life Crises are practically non-existent in Ethiopia (how many people there even make it to middle-age?)

*High gas prices have little impact on a large portion of the Ethiopian populous who must rely on animal-power or their own feet for transportation.

In other words, Ethiopia is the cure for so many of our nation's ailments! If you happen to be a big fat middle-aged drunk with body dismorphia who is paying too much for gas for your brand new sports car, consider moving. To Ethiopia. Ethiopians know a few things we don't. They know the cure.

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